Thursday, December 29, 2011

Absolutely Ghoulish...

You know,

As In Dodge Trucks Are Ram Tough???

Oy!
whadda face...

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Don't Need Santa...

Already got my old man.....


A large influx of gin wouldn't hurt though....

Oh! Santa, Baby......


All we want for christmas is loose our two front teeth!

Happy Holidays!!!
xoxox from Wallywood.

Friday, December 23, 2011

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Looking Out Some New Doors...

This is what we see looking out of the front door of the restaurant:
The old town hall in the square.

And this is what we see looking out of the back door:
This is one of a mated pair of hawks that stop by for lunch everyday in the field behind us.

If You Please....



To Hell With the Diet!

We'll Have the Black Velvet and That Little Boy's Smile...
If You Please...

Friday, December 16, 2011

Here! This is Creepy:

If you facebook click this link HERE and logon with your facebook account....




Really Creepy...

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Kinda Makes Ya Wanna Holler Hidee-Ho.....

Burns your Tummy now,
 don't ya know?

Chug-a-lug, Chug-a-lug...

What a Mind Scramble...



After leaving NYC a week ago almost to the hour, we finally have a little time to sit down and collect our thoughts and share them.
We now are residing  in a little town in north Georgia called Blairsville, it's very scenic here in the Blue Ridge mountains and so far we find ourselves very contented, albeit stretched. Our long time friend, Mark, owns a restaurant in the center of town called The Hole in the Wall, and when we say the center of town we mean right on the square (which is funny because it's a circle). It also is the center of gossip for the town and in many ways it seems more dangerous than the city, we are quite sure you understand...


The reason we haven't had much time since we arrived is that Mark had booked a party, a catered affair, at one of the towns wealthier inhabitant's home, and so, no sooner had we arrived that we had to get busy, very busy.  Mark explained that the host was "sensitive",  this is the code word here for gay,  so we have learned....


The party was great, the most amazing house and we got to feed all the well-to-do poofters in the closet club...


Ho hum...


Back to the town and the diner. the people here refer to themselves as hillbillies and at the diner we serve such delicacies as chicken & dumplings, collard greens, country fried steak and yes, fried green tomatoes....


More to come as we settle in....








Sunday, December 11, 2011

Important Update... ...

Not only can we pee off the front porch,  
but we can also leave our empty cans on the rail, 
indefinitely...

Friday, December 9, 2011

Three Dogs.....

Walk into a Vet's Office....


Number three says, "Whatcha in for?"


Number one says, "Oh, I'm a pooper, I'm a pooper....".


Number three says, "So, you're getting your nuts cut off....


Number one says, "Yeah."
-


Number one says to number two, "Howd'a find yourself here?"


Number two says, "Well, I'm a pisser,   I'm a pisser......".

Number three says, "So, you're getting your nuts cut off...".

Number two says, "Yeah."
-

And then  numbers one & two chime up and ask number three: "What are you here for????"?

Number three says, "I'm a fucker, I'm a fucker...".  "In fact, just this morning my mistress bent over to clean under the kitchen sink, and I fucked her!".......

One & Two say:  :"So you are here to get your nuts snipped too.....".

Number Three says:  "No, I'm just getting my nails done........................................"!

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Feeling Quite Like Patty Duke, Thank You.....

Most Likely Because We Just had Our First Haircut in Six Years...

A New Career in a New Town...

Just wanted to let you all know that we are now up on the mountain and that we will be able to give a more complete updated in just a few more days.  We already feel our creative juices flowing and decompression has begun....

We are quite sure our abilities to amuse will be in full force shortly...


Thanks for the support.


qw



Sunday, December 4, 2011

Very Much in Need of an Old Sweet Song Right Now....

How About You?



We received a call from one of our proteges & current employer, and he told us one of the prettiest things  we have ever heard....


He said:
"You know, you could be driving and come to a stop, and you could just sit there for twenty minutes;  no one is going to honk at you, no one is even behind you, I'll bet you'll like that..."


 What we have decided to do is the best thing for all of us, stick around & you will see, history in the making....


qw

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Thirteen Years Ago Today....

We touched down at La Guardia to receive and possess our "New York Story", and now we must gather that we have, and so, soon all will be revealed....


Every place a vagabond sojourns carries weight; every place embodies the good and the bad of nature, human and otherwise...  


Somethings we will miss-


Cherry trees blooming in December-

The annual painting of the pumpkins...

&
Aptly named family owned businesses...


It really is just like a movie, and that, most of the time.

Just Blowing Through to Profess Our Unwavering Love for You.....

Be Back Soon,
With a Vengeance...

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

We Know....

How About a Snack?

We Couldn't Stand to Have You All Peckish in Our Absence ...

Monday, November 28, 2011

Sunday, November 27, 2011

It Always Amazes Us that Americans, as a Whole, Do not Understand the Difference Between Object and Subject...

This has been going on for years....

We should invest more money into eyeliner purchases.

Insert Brigette Bardot Photo Here:.......

Oh, never mind, we'll just do that ourselves...


We Got to Go, We Got to Go.....



All Aboard, All Aboard....

Hopefully before the Euro collapses....

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Friday, November 25, 2011

We Are Thankful for Our Internet Boyfriend.....


She knows who she is and is always welcome in our trailer...

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Thanksgiving....

Dad's Praying:
"This is it? Why couldn't I have married a girl that knows how to cook?"

Little Richie is Praying:
"Turkey turkey bo burkey, ponanna fanna fo furkey, me my moe murkey.... Turkey!"


Little Susie is Praying:
"When I grow up I'm going to buy those hiking boots that dad won't let me have, I'm going to marry a greaser and maybe then he'll understand that I am in control of my life; (after I eat some turkey, I am going to the bathroom to use that finger trick that Aunt Judy showed me! She has control!!!).


Sissey is Praying:
"Please Dear Lord, Please just make mother die, so that I can have daddy all to myself".



Mother is Praying:
"Thank You for bringing me such a stupid hard-working man, one that didn't even argue about paying for this ugly, expensive wallpaper. Thank you that he and his spawn are so stupid that they don't even realize that there are no plates on the table. Please Dear Lord, remind me to check the status of the insurance policies tomorrow because the Christmas tree just may catch on fire this year! And even if it doesn't I should update Sissey's policy as I think she's on to me. But most of all, Thank you that they are all stupid enough to believe that I don't know how to cook..."


AMEN



MANY HAPPY GOBBLES OF THE DAY,
OUR LOVIES!

Certainly!!!

We will be able to maintain an erection in this room until you are satisfied...


In Your Wildest Motherfucking Dreams....
Instead of my dick, might I suggest my savvy, good taste & brain?

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Our Future???

Fairly Soon
This Queens Queen will be Going into Exile...
This Could be Very Well what Our New Wall Street will Look Like!!!

VIA


UPDATE:
By the Way of One Mr. Von Lx.....
 Nowhere is safe, our dears...

There Is a Reason why We Call MJ, "Mistress MJ"....


Thanks for thinking of us...

Monday, November 21, 2011

Sunday, November 20, 2011

And He is So Blase' About It....

Well,
We Guess that He Knows what He Likes to do with a Bunch of Long-haired, Intelligent, Educated, Dandies...


SAME AS KING GEORGE III !!!


Backstory HERE
Andrew Sullivan's thoughts HERE

Imagine, throwing away your career, after working so hard to get that C average in high school and all those deep, deep thoughts about life that he had over all of those tasty, tasty doughnuts over the years...

We may even feel bad for him...

Newt? Who is this Delusional Piece of Crap???

But More Scary are the Idiots that are Cheering for Him!....



Friday, November 18, 2011

The Sidewalks of New York City....

All Apologies, Updated, Edited Version:

We were having cocktails (gin mixed with champagne is never a good idea...).  Just then we noted that we were out of beer and tobacco, then bowed out gracefully for some shopping and an extended promenade.  As we approached the "EL" (elevated train; subway), where loads of people were disembarking, as it was still rush hour, we then locked eyes with this positively sexy man in his prime, with two guitars strapped to his back, looking for something...
Indeed!
He was looking for a flame, unfortunately only the kind that lights a cigarette....

The Story of Our Life...


Anyway, when that incredibly romantic brief tryst was over, after we light his cigarette,  we went on our way, and behind us we heard a "SLAP!".  We needed beer so we did not turn around....


The Indian guys at our new bodega have warmed up to us now & we have gotten very used to not staring at the bull's-eyes in the middle of their foreheads, they have been very gracious since they realized that we are a regular customer. We then left and began to back-track, and right where we lit the cigarette, on the sidewalk was a music book, obviously dropped & not discarded...

Thinking about the spats going on in the apartments of New York, and that pretty and groovy boy, we decided we had to know what song the book had been flopped open to....

Therefore,
 We Returned to See...
(kind of like Tarot, don't you think?)....


We,

Would Just Adore to Know what Your Guesses Are
Before You Scroll Down for
The Close-up...




Do You Think You Know?

Well,

Here it is Boys!

Here it is World!

Here's Our Tarot Reading!
:



Hhhaaaaaaaaaaaah!

...Down at the end of lonely street... 



Tuesday, November 15, 2011

A Really Happy Outcome for All Involved...

We just got off the phone with our closest of friends & confidantes, Agnes.

Agnes lives in Florida and is a most remarkable person, not only does she handle really, really huge corporate finances, her own lovely family, her huge extended family along with bailing out our sorry ass with some regularity, you'd think she would want to relax in the pool with a nice can of beer?  Well, not my friend Ag, what does she do? She made time to register with the state as a GAL (guardian ad litem), a child advocate. One of her first and longest lasting cases is a little boy named George, that was neglected and abused by his traditional parents mostly for being a little slow.  Ag & I have talked, cried, muddled and prayed on many occasions over George...
Her call to me today was to share that George has been adopted by a lovely, loving couple that happen to be gay...


Please watch this video and see how happy every one is, the parents, the judge, my friend Agnes, but most importantly see how beautiful and happy little George is.


This Time My Tears Are From Joy....
HERE IS THE LINK

Monday, November 14, 2011

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Yes!

Tomorrow I start my fiftieth year, even though the last thing I remember was being a sophomore and flicking American lit to smoke a ton of weed in the boy's room with Gary, (may he rest in peace).

Excuse me as I have a pill party to go to...

In the Case that None of You Noticed, We are a Fiddler Too....





For all of you that follow that dirty old crazy queen of Queens, this is just a little taste of the future...
Have a gin & bromide, god knows we are...
We have a gig for a change.

Friday, November 11, 2011

We Certainly Hope That This Doesn't Make You Gag......





Totally Lifted From AMERICAblog.....



We thought all about the hottest of peppers today....

SEEMS, 
BEFITTING, SOMEHOW....

But, for the boys over there at that website,
A
SONG>>>




And why would you feed a hot pepper to a blonde anyway?
Sadist..

A Sincere and Hearfelt Thank You for All of the Noble Veterens Out There...

Again,
Thank You.

Wally

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Pennnnnnnn is State....

Old folks like we listen to amplitude modulation radio...
(AM)

Surprised?


Big Story In The U.S.A !

Anyway, we just wanted to point out that the same people that rioted last night at University, are the exact same people that want we, "Spectacular",  peeps to stay in line...

(Not to mention that it takes away from people protesting real crimes against humanity; et cetera.).

The poor pathetic bastard chose to live in the bubble of his own successs ...
He became haughty...
(Which is a whole lot of fun while it lasts!)


Jocks are really so much better in gay porn.



And usually,  in gay porn, you have to crochet your own..

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Things Are Crazy Kids...

I just almost poured some Love My Carpet into my beers.
Perhaps it will be an interesting week!

Maybe it will help me vote for The Gayest Thing in Your House contest over at infomaniac....
"Cock the Vote".

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Hair Knott !!! ...

We are only here to protect you...


via Warm Chills
So let it be written, so let it be done.

The Fate of Our Universe Rest Upon the Shoulders of Some Female and the Interpretation Thereof....

Perhaps We Should do Our Kegel Exercises Now.....
That snake-eyed hussey...



You Are All so Good.....



We are really not that surprised....

Could someone roll us a cigarette, please?

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Knit One, Purl Two....


Oh, Really!!!

You Want to Discuss MY Mental Health???

Have at it Louise....
But From Here on Out
Everything
is Fair Game......

I may even try to wrench that bottle of whiskey out from between Mistress MJ's clenching thighs...

Someone Must Have Ordered Pizza....

No Need for Extra Cheese....

Boys....

Dear Lord....




Do You Have Anymore Whiskey Upstairs?

And Perhaps a Daisy Shaver?
And a scalpel 

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

You are a Superstar.....

Tree Food is What You Are.

Just Like the Rest of the Saints,
Even on all Saints Day....


So, 
Take Your Hat Off...

Sunday, October 30, 2011

We Were Going to do a Whitty Post.......

But when we went to do it, we forgot whether we were looking for black holes or the
Countess De Lave.....
Well,
What does it Matter?


See?
I don't even remember her name....

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Thunder Snowstorm in NYC ....

Talk About the Weather,
HUH?
stock image
Just too weird...